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The Power of Praise: Why Focusing on Effort Matters More Than the Outcome

  • Writer: James Carroll, LCPC, LPC, RPT-S
    James Carroll, LCPC, LPC, RPT-S
  • Mar 24
  • 2 min read

As parents, teachers, and caregivers, we naturally want to encourage children and build their confidence. However, the way we praise them can have a lasting impact on their mindset, motivation, and resilience. Research shows that praising a child’s effort rather than the end result fosters a growth mindset, helping them embrace challenges and persist through difficulties.


The Problem with Praising the Product

When we say things like:

  • "You’re so smart!"

  • "You’re the best artist!"

  • "Perfect score—you’re a genius!"


We may think we’re boosting confidence, but we’re actually sending an unintended message: success is about innate talent, not hard work. This can lead to:

  • Fear of failure – If a child believes their worth is tied to being "the best," they may avoid challenges to protect their self-image.

  • Fixed mindset – They may think abilities are static, making them less likely to improve through effort.

  • Dependence on validation – They might seek constant approval rather than developing intrinsic motivation.


Why Praising Effort Works Better

Instead of focusing on the outcome, try:

  • "You worked so hard on this—I’m proud of you!"

  • "I can see how much effort you put into solving that problem."

  • "Your practice is really paying off!"


This approach teaches children that:

  • Effort leads to growth – They learn that improvement comes from persistence.

  • Mistakes are part of learning – Struggling doesn’t mean failure; it’s a step toward mastery.

  • They have control – Success isn’t about being "naturally gifted" but about dedication.


How to Shift Your Praise for Maximum Impact

  1. Be specific – Instead of "Great job!" say, "I noticed how you kept trying even when it was tough."

  2. Acknowledge the process – Highlight strategies they used, like "You broke the problem into smaller steps—that was smart!"

  3. Encourage reflection – Ask, "What was the hardest part? How did you figure it out?"

  4. Celebrate progress, not perfection – "Last time this was difficult, but look how much better you’ve gotten!"


The Long-Term Benefits

Children who are praised for effort develop:

  • Resilience – They bounce back from setbacks.

  • Love of learning – They enjoy challenges instead of fearing them.

  • Self-motivation – They strive for improvement, not just external rewards.

By shifting our praise from the product to the process, we help children build confidence that lasts a lifetime—not because they were told they were "the best," but because they know they can grow through effort.




Child smiling with muddy hands, wearing a black shirt with colorful heart design. Background is a blurred outdoor setting with greenery.

"Praise the work, not the winner. Celebrate the effort, not just the outcome."

How do you encourage effort in your child? Share your thoughts in the comments!

 
 
 

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